How to Channel Your Inner 'Sasha Fierce'

Written by Ayesha Cobb, Hairstylist at Urban Betty

Having confidence is super important in my opinion. Having confidence gives you happiness. It prevents you from being pushed around, it can give you a positive attitude, the strive to work to the top, and it can even influence others. Beyonce calls it 'Sasha Fierce'. It's not an easy thing to have, I'm still practicing it myself. Confidence is knowing you are worth it, and knowing your goals/future achievements are as vast as the universe. Confidence is beautiful. We all deserve confidence.

I'm currently practicing my 'confidence exercise' and so far, so good. It is a bit of a struggle, but I've made it easier by just trying one exercise a month, and eventually they'll become a part of my everyday life. I have 6 exercises that I do to channel my inner 'Sasha Fierce’ and so far, three on that list have become a regular habit. As life goes on, my confidence exercise list gets longer AKA my vast goals list.

1. Appearance/Investing in Yourself

The first and maybe over-looked exercise is appearance. Have you ever seen a CEO looking frumpy at work, or anyone with a high position dressed awful? I haven't. Have you ever gotten your hair done or bought a dress that you absolutely love and every time you put it on you feel amazing and KNOW you look good? What if you could have that feeling more often? Confidence comes from the inside, but you can step closer toward that if you feel confident on the outside.

One of my secrets is to never buy something unless it will be one of my favorite things in my closet-- then I know I’ll have that feeling every single day. Make sure that you have enough to invest in your appearance by saving money every three months, so that you can have a special ‘glow up’ month. You are worth the investment. Investing in clothes, hair, and skin care products will make the outside reflect the beautiful inside.

2. Positive Affirmations

Every morning I choose a list of songs that make me feel confident, put my earphones on,

drown out the rest of the world, and shower myself with positive affirmation music. Immerse yourself in music that builds your confidence. For me, it's Beyonce, Rihanna and Cardi B because they me feel like a boss. FKJ makes me feel peaceful, Raveena and Sabrina Claudio make me feel sexy, which all together it makes me feel confident.

I listen to songs as if I wrote them for myself. For example in the song “Formation”, Beyonce says "I just might be a black Bill Gates in the making,". I say "I am a black Bill Gate in the making" to hype myself up. I believe it and then go on with my day. Pretty soon you'll start believing you are that song and that vibe because you are.

Since songs stay in your head, you can replay their message over and over again, making this one of the easiest affirmations. You can also practice positive affirmations in your daily life as well. When you wake up every morning, tell yourself three wonderful things. Even if you don’t believe them just yet, the more you say them and listen, the more you will start to believe them and embody more confidence.

3. Body Position Awareness

This one is so hard for me, but practice makes perfect. Body positioning is difficult because when I’m not paying attention I slouch. Slouching is associated with insecurity and lack of strength. The way you should stand is with your back straight and your chin tilted up just a smidge. When I do this I feel silly or think "OMG I look like a snob!”, but that's when I add a slight smile to this body positioning.

It takes some getting use to, but just try to make it a habit. Good posture benefits your spine; it makes you look confident and approachable and it even tricks your mind into feeling happy when you're feeling down. Try the "Wonder Woman/Super Man" stance every morning to start off the day with confident posture.

4. SMARTR goals

SMARTR goals are goals that are Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, Time-bound and Rewarding. Rewarding goals encourages you to start. Measurable and Time-bound goals encourage you to progress. Specific, Attainable, and Realistic goals encourage you to complete. And, completing goals give you confidence.

What are your thoughts about these two goals: "I will learn 10 phrases in Chinese by next month and then treat myself to a service at Urban Betty" versus "I will learn Chinese"? Which goal are you more likely to attempt? Which goal will you be more likely to complete? Which goal has a bigger risk of internalizing self-doubt?

5. Self Help Books

Self help books are definitely a part of growing up and reading them at a younger age is super beneficial, but it’s never too late to start also. I've recently been reading You are a Badass by Jen Sincero. Browse around the bookstore or on Audible and find a book that speaks to you on your adventure for becoming more confident.

Like I said, it doesn't matter what age you are-- if you’re needing a little boost in guidance, go get it. I just started my book and it’s making me see things in a different way. You can also go back to a book you already read just to remind yourself of the advice it provided. Self help books can be reminders of what you already know, or they can give you an entire new outlook on life, and help you give advice to others. Self help books can also pose as affirmations when you read them and then repeat the message back to yourself. You are what you read!

6. Find a Role Model

As we get older, I feel like we forget the importance of a role model. A role model is someone that you strive to be like. Everybody makes mistakes as we are all human; but, its good to have a person in mind that is at the level you are reaching for.

For example, mine is a YouTuber named Patricia Bright. She's smart, fashionable, and filled with great advice. You can find your role model anywhere; it can be anyone, past, present, fictional, or even a co-worker. A role model keeps your head straight and keep you on track for what you’re trying to be. If your role model is someone that you know personally, that's awesome! Reach out to them and ask them questions; see if they can give you any advice.